Why I Fired My Secretary

Two weeks ago, was my forty-fifth birthday, and I wasn't feeling too
hot that morning anyway. I went into breakfast, knowing my wife would be
pleasant and say Happy Birthday and probably have a present for me.

She didn't even say Good Morning, let alone any Happy Birthday. I said,
well,that's wives for you. The children will remember.

The children came into breakfast and didn't say a word. When I started
to the office I was feeling pretty low and despondent.

As I walked into my office, my secretary, Janet said, "Good Morning,
Boss, Happy Birthday."

And I felt a little better; someone had remembered.

I worked until noon.

About noon Janet knocked on my door and said, "You know it's such a
beautiful day outside and it's your birthday, let's go to lunch, just
you and me."

I said, "By George, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's
go."

We went to lunch. We didn't go where we normally go; we went out into
the country to a little private place. We had two martinis and enjoyed
lunch tremendously.

On the way back to the office, she said, "You know, it's such a
beautiful day. We don't need to go back to the office. Do we?"

I said, "No, I guess not."

She said, "Let's go to my apartment."

After arriving at her apartment, we had another martini and smoked a
cigarette and she said, "Boss, if you don't mind, I think I'll go into
the bedroom and slip into something more comfortable."

"Sure," I excitedly replied. She went into the bedroom and in about six
minutes, she came out... .. carrying a big birthday cake, followed by my
wife and children. All were singing Happy Birthday. and there on the
couch I sat...

with nothing on but my socks......